Friday, February 25, 2005

My Hero

"He didn't tell me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it." - Clarence Budington Kelland.

The cool wind of the Marina was hitting hard on my cheeks which got cold. I was grabbing tight around him, I was scared I might fall of. It was a 175cc Rajdoot, it was a pride ride. "My dad's got a Rajdoot, Rambali's dad'd just got a TVS 50". A Pride ride for sure.

I liked all the science fiction stories he told me as much as I used to like the bike rides in Marina beach. He is a versatile reader, reads Kenneth Anderson and Jim Corbett's Nine man eaters and one rogue, tiger hunting stories. Also reads Sherlock Holmes, Fredrick Foresith, Arthur Hailey and what not. The habit of reading stuck to me from young age. Actually I started with Shikari Shambu and Uncle Anu in Tinkle...

He was an Engineer with a Hydraulics Company. His achievements made me think he was my Hero. That go getter attitude he had ...

Then it happened one fine day. He came back with a copy of his resignation letter. He resigned the job. "We will go to our native and settle down.. we have three houses there, whats more" he said. The very notion of leaving that big city and busy life and settling down in a remote town shocked me. My Mom was the worst affected, she had never lived anywhere out of this city.

I went to boarding school, secluded from the city life but still very much located in the heart of the city. I was lonely. There were no more pride rides, no more tinkle reading, no more eating Bhel and Pani Puri in the roadside stall. It was a famous Non-Governmental Spiritual organization (Names not mentioned). We should not have visitors more than once a month, no fancy wrist watches, no pocket money, no fancy T-shirts, no outings. I was lonely. I did not get to see much of my family. In one corner of my heart, I started hating the person whom I most loved ... My Hero. I was drawn towards meditation (though I was too young for that). Morning Bhajans, Evening Poojas, I was drawn into Music.

When I completed a year, I had to make a decision that most of the Indian students have no difficulty making. Whether to choose Science or Commerce as my stream. I made the right choice I thought. Science, obviously - my only fascination. Two months passed, I seemed to like the Physics a lot better than the other Subjects.

"Nirupesh, the head master wants to see you", the class teacher told me. There he was sitting in front of the headmaster, My Hero. "Your father feels that it is appropriate for you to choose commerce. He says you are lazy and would not fare well in Science. I deny that, however you cannot be lazy and get into an engineering college in the state today. He feels that you should take up something like Chartered Accounting". After two months of studying Science, I had to move into a different class, different people, different teachers, different subject.

"Debit what comes in, Credit what goes out". The ABC of accountancy, was hard to remember. I missed Doppler Effect, and Carbon 14 Dating in Organic Chemistry. My Hero ? No he is not. He is the person who ruined my career dream. How could he possibly think I would have a better future studying commerce? He was happy about the change.

When I was in the final year of B.Com it happened, My mom was hospitalized. She was a diabetic. My Semester exams starts today. My mom would be taken inside the ICU the same time I would enter the exam hall. I could see my hero (is he or is he not) going to the small Ganesh temple in the hospital every day three times, and praying. My Hero, yes he is, has not lost hopes even the doctors have. That go getter attitude ?! Finally it happened, after 15 days of struggle, she passed away. It was a multi-organ failiure. he broke down, but only for sometime. I did not cry. My sister, was the worst affected, I told her not to worry, I knew there was someone who could take care of us - My Hero (yes he is).

Years have passed, My sister is studying what she wanted to study, B.tech (Bio-Informatics). This time he did not want to interfere. I am a Support Engineer for one of the most demanding segment in the IT industry. I am happy with my job today. I called him up yesterday, he was happy to be able to talk to me anytime he wanted. I bought him a mobile phone .... My Hero, still sitting in that remote town all alone, spending time wisely, thinking of how to get me and my sister settled in life, still reading books, only reading different authors now. He started Michael Crichton's after I once told him it was good ....

[Note: this post is dedicated to my dad - I know you dont pay attention to stuff I write, but if you ever read this, I love you Mr.B.N.Joshi]

Monday, February 14, 2005

Aham Brahmasmi - This Self is Brahman (Divinity)

"When men destroy their old gods they will find new ones to take their place" - Pearl S. Buck

Bharatiya does not mean a person born in the country of Bharat (India) alone. The culture of Bharat (India) is the mother. The country of Bharat (India) is the father. Bharat (India)iya is one who has faith in and lives under the care of these parents. Several noble souls have taken birth in Bharat (India), followed the great culture of this country and set examples to others. Sri Sankaracharya is one such great personality who spread the culture of Bharat (India) throughout the length and breadth of the country and earned eternal fame. Adi Sankara taught the philosophy of Advaita. Three centuries after him came Sri Ramanujacharya who advocated the Visishtadvaita system of philosophy which emphasised Bhakti (devotion) and Prapatthi (surrender) to God. Two centuries afterSriRamanujacharya, Sri Madhwacharya arrived on the scene and propagated the Dvaita system of philosophy emphasising the devotional path to the people vacillating between several systems of philosophy. However, the fundamental principle underlying all the three schools of philosophy is one and the same, that is, Atma Tattwa (Atmic principle).

The Advaita (non-dualistic) philosophy of Sri Sankaracharya advocates the oneness of Jiva (individual soul) and Brahman (cosmic soul). The Visishtadvaita philosophy of Sri Ramanujacharya presupposes that Jiva and Brahman are different. Sri Madhwacharya explained that there are, in fact, three concepts, namely, Dehatma Bhava (body consciousness), Jivatma Bhava (individualised form of God) and Paramatma Bhava (the universalised soul or the Supreme self). Nobody need hold on to a particular school of thought or deride the others. The question of adhering to a particular school of philosophy depends upon the mental frame work of the individual. Sri Sankaracharya emphasised that though the cloth is of different varieties, the thread underlying the cloth is one and the same. “The cloth is made of a number of threads woven together”, explained Sri Ramanujacharya. One has to recognise the underlying principle behind the three schools of philosophy, namely, the Advaita, the Visishtadvaita and the Dvaita,

Ornaments are many, gold is one;colours of the cows are many, milk is one;Beings are many, the Indweller is one;Nationalities are many, humanness is one.

Adi Sankara had a short life span of 32 years. Though the philosophy advocated by Sri Sankaracharya, Sri Ramanujacharya and Sri Madhwacharya acquired different names, namely, Advaita, Visishtadvaita and Dvaita, the underlying nature of the three types is one, that is Atma Tattwa. The same can be explained with the example of gold forming the base for ornaments with different names and forms. Not realising the fundamental unity between the three schools of philosophy, people adhering to the different schools of philosophy derided one another which gave scope for a number of misconceptions in the world about the country of Bharat (India). In order to explain the truth Ekatma Sarva Bhutantaratma (one Atma dwells in all beings), Adi Sankara gave some examples. He took out an ornament and explained that the metal with which the ornament was made was gold, thus going into the fundamental principle. The same principle was explained in a different way by Sri Ramanujacharya who emphasised that though gold forms the basis for the ornament, since it has assumed the form of a chain, it should be termed as a gold chain.

Sri Sankaracharya while advocating the Advaita philosophy quoted the Vedic dictum Ekameva Adviteeyam Brahma (God is one without a second). Sri Ramanujacharya, however, did not agree with this view. His viewpoint was how could there be a Prathibimba (image) without a Bimba (object). He thus explained the oneness of the object and the image, which he termed as Visishtadvaita (qualified non-dualism). Another example given in this context was the sugarcane juice. The juice is extracted from different varieties of sugarcane and a number of sweetmeats are made out of the juice. Though the juice is one, it has now assumed different forms. While Sri Sankaracharya emphasised the oneness of the sweet juice and the sugarcane, Sri Ramanujacharya dwelt upon the different forms the juice has assumed. Thus, ever since the times of the three great Acharyas till today, there are a number of arguments and counter arguments between the three schools of philosophy.

Present day students do not have faith in any of these three schools of philosophy. They just brush aside these systems as a figment of imagination. Sugar made out of the sugarcane juice is the main ingredient for making various sweets. The sugar is sweet. Similarly, Brahman is the source and sustenance for the entire universe. Wherever you see, you will find manifestation of the Divine (Brahman) in ever so many forms. The forms change and are illusory in nature. Brahman alone is the eternal, changeless principle. That is why Sri Sankaracharya has declared Brahma Sathyam Jagat Mithya (Brahman alone is real, the world is illusory). All the three great Acharyas, namely, Sri Sankaracharya, Sri Ramanujacharya and Sri Madhwacharya propagated the same principle, that is Atma Tattwa. The Upanishads declare that the entire universe is permeated by the same Atmic principle. That truth is contained in the Upanishadic dicta Ekatma Sarva Bhutantaratma (one Atma dwells in all beings), Easwarah Sarva Bhutanam (God is the Indweller of all beings) and Isavasyam Idam Sarvam (the entire universe is permeated by God). The rain, the water that flows into the river and the sand in the river that sustains it, all are one and only one. Everything is Brahman. Since every object in this universe is Brahman, nothing can be disregarded or ignored. This principle of Brahman is called “Divine” in the English language. But, many ignorant or cynical persons take it as “deep wine” and take to imbibing intoxicating substances. Disregarding such perversion, we have to realise that the sweetness underlying Divinity is one only. This oneness in the great culture of Bharat (India) has been propagated since ancient times. In keeping with this great tradition, consider everyone, whether it is an ant or an animal or a human being, as verily Brahman. Some people may have a doubt in this context whether a human being and an animal can be equated. Yes, so far as the Atmic principle is concerned. However, the behavioural pattern of the animal is different from that of the human being. Considering this aspect, one may conclude that they are different but the underlying Jiva Tattwa is one and the same. On the basis of this Jiva Tattwa, you cannot differentiate at all between the living beings. Thus, Sarvam Brahmamayam Jagat (the entire universe is permeated by Brahman).

This truth can be explained by a simple example. This is a white cloth and that is a saffron cloth. Though the colours are different, the cloth is one. The cloth may be of different colours and put to different uses, but the cloth is only one and the same. The cloth is the source. One has to recognise the oneness of the source. Once you recognise the source, all differences vanish in no time. Unfortunately, today, we are giving importance to the names and forms, forgetting the basis and source for all names and forms. As a result, we are undergoing innumerable difficulties and sorrows.

Adi Sankara has explained the Advaitic principle beautifully in his famous Bhaja Govindam song thus:

"Bhaja Govindam, Bhaja GovindamGovindam Bhaja Moodha MatheSamprapthe Sannihithe KaleNahi Nahi Rakshati Dukrun Karane."

- (Oh foolish man, chant the name of Govinda, the rules of grammar will not come to your rescue when the end approaches.) If the end approaches, nothing can save you except the Divine Name. Therefore, chant the Divine Name.

Thus, Sri Sankaracharya exhorted, awakened and taught the world. Further explaining the sorrows and difficulties faced by man in his life’s sojourn in this objective world and the need to seek refuge in the Divine grace, Sri Sankaracharya composed the following stanza:

"Punarapi Jananam Punarapi MaranamPunarapi Janani Jathare SayanamIha Samsare Bahu DustareKripayapare Pahi Murare."

- (Oh Lord! I am caught up in this cycle of birth and death time and again; I am experiencing the agony of staying in the mother’s womb. It is very difficult to cross this ocean of worldly life. Please take me across this ocean and grant me liberation.)

One has to analyse, in this context, as to what is it that is subject to birth and death again and again. The Deha (body) undergoes this cycle of birth and death, but the Atma is eternal. As long as the Atma remains in the body as the Indweller, there will be consciousness in the body. The moment the Atma leaves the body, it becomes jada (inert). This phenomenon is called death. Unable to realise this truth, man subjects himself to sorrow. Birth and death are only for the outer form, not for the Atma. A short story in this context. There was once a philospher-son, who was learning Vedas. By the time he completed his Vedic learning, his mother completed forty years of life. She left her mortal body in her 40th year. The son was deeply immersed in sorrow. Then, his guru called him and tried to counsel him explaining, “Whom do you consider as your mother? The body? No, this is not your mother. You are wailing over a dead body which your mother has left. In fact, the body is right before you. Why should you have to weep? The Chaitanya Shakti (power of consciousness) has left the body. It means that Chaitanya Shakti represents your father and mother, not the forms and attachments to those forms. No doubt, it is true that relationship does exist with the physical form for sometime. But, thereafter the body ceases to exist.

When you realise the truth, you will understand the futility of the relationship with the physical body”. The objects may be different, but the source and sustenance for the objects is only one. The same source assumes different names and forms. One should not develop dependence on the names and forms, which are subject to change. This simple truth based on the Mooladhara Tattwa has been explained by different people in different ways as high sounding philosophy. This has given scope to some misconceptions to a certain extent. In fact, the underlying principle behind the Advaita philosophy of Sri Sankaracharya and Visishtadvaita philosophy of Sri Ramanujacharya is one and the same.

Today, we are taking very lightly such a great and noble philosophy. Sri Sankaracharya’s Philosophy is profound in nature and explains the great truth in simple and beautiful poetry. Any amount of explanation will be insufficient to bring out the underlying philosophy in full measure.

Sri Sankaracharya has written a great commentary (bhashya) on Bhagavad Gita also. In his commentary on Gita, Adi Sankara has explained that there is Advaita in Dvaita and Dvaita in Advaita. Further, the Visishtadvaita contains both Advaita and Dvaita concepts as well. All the three schools of philosophy, therefore lead to the same goal and their underlying meaning is Brahma Sathyam Jaganmithya (Brahman alone is the truth and the world is illusory).

The whole world appears as containing innumerable names and forms. One should not be enmeshed with these names and forms. It is only when the names and forms are set aside and the underlying source is identified that it is possible to recognise the truth. And that truth is Tattwamasi (That Thou Art). That is Prajnanam Brahma (constant integrated awareness is Brahman). That awareness is Ayam Atma Brahma (This Self is Brahman). When you analyse the Mahavakya Tattwamasi, it will lead you to the awareness “I am That” and “That I am”. When you are able to realise this truth, you will find that the principle “I” underlies everything in the universe as the principle of unity. We have to recognise that “I” principle which is universal. It is a futile exercise to get into arguments and counter-arguments over this matter and waste one’s time. The only aspect you have to realise is “I am Brahman”. When somebody questions you who you are, the proper answer would be “I am I”, “I am the word, I am the form and I am the name”. This “I” represents and explains everything.

When somebody questions who you are, do not reply by quoting your name. The name represents the name given to the body. You are not the body. Hence reply “I am I”. Everyone should strive to attain that state of unity.

The Vedantic concepts lead to endless arguments and counter-arguments. Do not enter into them. Always be under the awareness “I am I”. This “I” principle is beyond names and forms. It represents Brahma Tattwa, which is one without a second entity.

[Note: This blog is an excerpt from the discourse by Sri Sathya Sai Baba. This does not mean that I am his devotee, it is just that I am a believer of the Athmic Philosphy described here.]

Thursday, February 10, 2005

932

932, thats the number of emails I had in my inbox when I came to work today after 10 days of "medical" leave due to the accident.

"05_SELFASSESSMENT_FINAL_FEB02" the excel file read. It was for the quarterly assessment at our office. They gonna assess my improvement in the last quarter. Bah !

Back to busy life once again. Will keep blogging .....

More of Aero India 2005, Bangalore.

Aero India 2005 in Bangalore. Don't have passes to Visit :(

Friday, February 04, 2005


Thats New Delhi, India Gate, and Rajpat where the Republic day parade happened the previous day.I was walking on Rajpat when I shot this.

Et Tu Sheelu ?

I was flipping six One Rupee coins one by one into the Platform-ticket Vending Machine at the Bangalore Cantonement Railway Station.

"You needn't have come so far, could have stayed at home" my dad was telling me. I told him the same. "Dad, you shouldn't have come in the first place and secondly you shouldn't be leaving too soon like this once you are here". My dad came to Bangalore the previous day to pay a visit.

He's not the kind who comes so far from Rameshwaram without a reason. "You had an accident last week, and you want to go to the Railway Station to see me off ? take rest at home, I can be on my own and Mercy would see me off" he was telling me some time back.

It was Sunday night when I was riding Mercy's Sheelu (thats what she calls her 6 year old TVS Scooty) when it happened. I dont want to get into the details of how it happened, but I ended up losing a lot of blood from my left foot which got 8 suitures.

I am on leave and haven't been going to work since then. Also losing some good Mentoring sessions by the Gentleman named Raj Balasubramaniam, from our Dallas division.

I am hoping to get back to work on Tuesday when the suitures would be off.

thats where the 8 suitures are ...